Fiction Friday – Wile E. Tweets


A little primer on some of the terms here for the Twilliterate. Too much? Yeah, I thought so, too.

Wile E. Coyote’s Twitter Timeline

AcmeFan49 — Super Genius business cards and coffee mug arrived. Café Press. Gotta love it.

AcmeFan49 – Feeling hungry. Going for fast food again. haha. Seriously tho. It will work this time.

WabbitSeasn — @AcmeFan49 Good luck, pal! Let me know how this one works out. Fight the good fight.

AcmeFan49 — Big day is here! @MarvinFrmMars When are you going to visit again? Been a long time.

AcmeFan49 – Staying in for a few days. Fur needs to grow back. All of it. Superman Lotion might have just been Nair with different label on it.

EatMaiDust — MEEP MEEP!

AcmeFan49 — @EatMaiDust Real mature. Don’t have you birdseed to peck at?

AcmeFan49 — New package came today! Just call me Carnivorous Giddius!

FghrnLghrn — I say, now, son. How’s that, I say, how’s that fur coming back in there now?

AcmeFan49 — Fur still patchy, but looking lustrous! Watch out coyotettes. I still can’t understand why you keep Tweeting like that, @FghrnLghrn.

FghrnLghrn — @AcmeFan49 I type like this cuz it’s my style, son.  I say, I don’t get how it is a carnivore like you, I say, gets blown up quite so much

AcmeFan49 — @FghrnLghrn You’re lucky you’re gigantic. Otherwise I’m pretty sure you would be a delicious meal.

MarvinfrmMars — @AcmeFan49 Furry Earthling! Was your most recent acquisition the Transmatter Displacer I created for Acme? Isn’t it delightful?

AcmeFan49 — @MarvinfrmMars The very same! From one super genius to another, thank you. I’ll save you a roadrunner drumstick. Maybe. jk.

AcmeFan49 — Plan 1,477. Transmatter Displacer not secured properly. Falling boulder shifted aim. Hind legs displaced into waiting deep fryer. Unpleasant

EatMaiDust — MEEP! MEEP MEEP!

AcmeFan49 — @MarvinfrmMars btw, thanks for nothing with that Transmatter Craplacement device.

MarvinfrmMars — @AcmeFan49 RTFM

WabbitSeasn — @AcmeFan49 You could always try switching to rabbit. Very lean.

AcmeFan49 — @WabbitSeasn And how’s that going for you? Going well? Didn’t think so.

AcmeFan49 — RT @WabbitSeasn Duck Season! Rabbit Season! Duck Season! How can you keep track when they talk so fast? Another fine from the state.

AcmeFan49 — Free shipping in the latest catalog. Acme has me again!

FghrnLghrn — @AcmeFan49 Now, son, you consider just going on ahead and stopping in at a restaurant this time.

AcmeFan49 — Okay haters (and soon-to-be-food), this one’s the one. Cooking up something big soon. Pun intended.

AcmeFan49 — Rocket-propelled segway. Anti-gravity boots. Parachute. Kevlar body suit. I can’t fail.

AcmeFan49 — Or chute could deploy early, segway could activate the boots, suit could limit my movement and I could land in Nebraska.  Also a plan.

BaconBoi — @AcmeFan49 That’s all folks!

AcmeFan49 — @BaconBoi That’s only cute with the stutter, Lunchable.

EatMaiDust — MEEP MEEP!

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  1. #1 by Oliver Grigsby on June 12, 2009 - 3:16 PM

    This cracked me up. “RTFM” actually had me LOL-ing. This is how I always imagined Wile E’s voice too.

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